This was quoted on a radio programme - I suspect there's more to the poem, as it seems to cover less than I'd expect from the title. Hugh - I seem to remember you're a Graham fan- is it one you know?

For years I led a dreary life
The days passed slowly, one by one
I fed the ducks, reproved my wife
Played Handel's Largo on the fife
Or gave the dog a run.

Yeah, I have a copy in Graham's When Grandmama Fell Off The Boat. Here is the rest of it:


Creature Comforts

For years I led a dreary life
The days passed slowly, one by one
I fed the ducks, reproved my wife,
Played Handel's Largo on the fife,
Or gave the dog a run.
I neither realised nor knew
The pleasures of a private Zoo.

I never loved a dear gazelle, (see Thomas Moore's Lalla Rookh)
To glad me with its soft black eye,
Nor ever to my lot it fell
To know a penguin really well,
Till, early last July,
I bought a small menagerie,
And oh! the difference to me! (everyone knows this one)

Now, when my spouse, perverse or cold,
Induces an attack of dumps,
I feel encouraged and consoled
When in their manège I behold
My camels' greater humps;
I fly from dear mama-in-law
To Kate, my talkative macaw.

When statesmen's speeches are disgraced
By vulgar insults which denote
A lamentable lack of taste,
I seek my monkey-house in haste
To find an antidote;
I turn for manners to the lair
Of Bosco, my performing bear.

Those "lions' whom we fête and feed,
Heroes of sword or brush or pen,
Are they more dignified, indeed,
Than creatures of that nobler breed
Which decorate my den?
The more my fellow-men I view,
The more I love my private Zoo!


[tinyurl.com]



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/19/2006 10:59AM by Hugh Clary.

Lovely! Thanks very much, Hugh - they mentioned When Grandmama Fell off the Boat on the radio programme, but I couldn't remember the title until you posted it.

I feel sure readers in Harry's day would have recognised more references than just the two that rang bells with me. You are probably too young to remember Bosco, but I recall many of their tv commercials from years ago.

[tinyurl.com]

[en.wikipedia.org]

Was there another performing bear named Bosco? Dunno. Lions, being in quotes, probably means something too, but again is lost on me.