Can anyone please tell me how the rest of this poem/saying goes..or at least the name of it so that I can find it somewhere... all I know of it is ... If "its" and "ands" were pots and pans........ and can't remember the rest.. if you have any clues please email me at AngelicTexan@excite.com Thank you..

. . .
something like

If 'ifs' and 'ands' were pots and pans
There'd be no work for tinkers.
If herrings grew on a blackberry bush,
Then we should be drinkers.

Then there's this one.

If "ifs" and "buts" were candy and nuts
We would all have a merry Christmas.

The version I've heard was 'If if's and an's were pots and pans, then what would the tinkers do?'

pam

The version I've heard was 'If if's and and's were pots and pans, then what would the tinkers do?'

pam

Here's another

If , 'ifs' and 'buts' were apples and nuts
Then beggars would have horses to ride on.

I am looking for the Fppt Prints Poem to give to my son.. It is really important that I find it soon.. I want to print it out for him.. I am a single mother and i am going through some hard times with my son.. He has had a pretty messed up life and now he has started going through peuberty... Times have been rough on the both of us.. So if you could please help me? It would help my son and I a great deal.

Thank you..

Footprints

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand: one belonging to him, and the other to the Lord.
When the scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the lowest and saddest times in his life.
This really bothered him and he questioned about it: "Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life, there is only one set of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed you most you would leave me?"
The Lord replied: "My son, my precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you."

I ran across this one today.

If wishes were fishes, no hooks would be needed.

The one I learned as a child would be a cross between Jp's and glenda's:
If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.

Angel Light,

If you go to the following site, you will not only get a very nice copy of the poem, but also an in depth study on it as well.

[www.geocities.com]

Brucefur

PS: I too like this poem very much, and have a copy of it hanging on my wall. In fact I liked it so much that I named my poetry book "Footprints in the Dark"

Good luck with your son!

Author: marian2 (---.in-addr.btopenworld.com)
Date: 08-06-02 03:30

The one I learned as a child would be a cross between Jp's and glenda's:
If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.


Hi, I came across your post and this is the poem I am looking for. Do you know all the verses?
thanks,
Karen

Sorry, kpearson, that was all I ever heard - just the couplet.

In Shaw's SAINT JOAN, Joan says, "If IFS and ANDS were pots and pans, there'd be no need of tinkers."


==

Ellen DeGeneres tells a twisted version of the FOOTPRINTS story. At the end she says to God, "What about that day where there was only one set of footprints in the sand?" And God says, "I was on your back."

'an' is an archaic conjunction short for 'and if' or 'if'. The verse was quoted with this at one time, which makes better sense and gives a perfect internal rhyme too. From the Puffin Book of Nursery Rhymes;

If 'ifs' and 'ans' were pots and pans
There'd be no work for tinkers.
If herrings grew on a blackberry bush
Then we should all be drinkers.

If ifs and buts were ifs and aws yankies wid still hiv baws .

'if if's and but's were pots and pans
then tinkers would be rich'

my mum always came out with this one when I couldn't make my mind up about something.

Don't know where I first heard this one:


If I had ham, I'd have ham and eggs.




If I had eggs.







Jack

If you come to a fork in the road, take it.
--Yogi Berra

If had has come, then have is too late.
(sounds better in Dutch)

If you come to a fork in the road, take it.
--Yogi Berra

You may come to a knife or a spoon next . . . and then a Pickernic Basket!
Yogi Bear



Post Edited (01-05-05 08:40)

According to AWAD, Yogi stole the technique from Goldwyn:

[www.mail-archive.com]

Hugh, I'm still searching for the web page of spoonerisms, which I used as a reference months ago on the General discussion area, but I can't seem to find it. Nor can I recall what key word which will bring it up on Google. Can't win them all I guess. That's probably because 90 per cent of this game is half mental.

Les



Post Edited (01-06-05 01:56)

[tinyurl.com] ??

Hugh, it is not on the thread you listed. For the life of me I can't remember the thread, or even whether, it preceded or succeeded the one above. But I do now recall that it listed quotes by Richard Lederer, a devotee of Spooner.


[www.matthewgoldman.com]


Les

Here's a sample of Lederer's work:

[www.jewishworldreview.com]


Les

Jed Hartman also has interesting pages for those who enjoy such diversions, and I do:

[kith.org]

Spoonerisms [kith.org]

You mean Don Meredith didn't make this up for Monday Night Football?

.......the world would be a kitchen

If "ifs" and "ands" were pots and pans
the world would be a kitchen.

My Grandmother told it to me like this "If if's and ands were pots and pans
then what would we do with Tinkers.