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My Own Abstraction
Posted by: petersz (67.174.198.---)
Date: October 11, 2021 02:28AM

My Own Abstraction

Sunday, October 10, 2021

I live below a dark sky
Going down
At the sill – shining…

In the passing universes
Far above my head
Out of the maze,
It is possible
For a poet
Without seeming to notice -
Secured
In a rusted world
At the window glass -
To ask why
In a way he could not understand.

We come to a parting -
Blocked
To lead to:
Everything has its own pattern
Brought whole
With something lost in time
While the poet waits
For a slow stop.

Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/11/2021 02:39AM by petersz.


Re: My Own Abstraction
Posted by: les712 (68.116.86.---)
Date: October 11, 2021 11:07AM

Peter, our whole world is an abstraction, whether we wish to believe it or not. Everything we perceive is colored by our previous experience. I enjoyed the read, nicely done.

Les


Re: My Own Abstraction
Posted by: Rosela (121.54.32.---)
Date: October 11, 2021 01:32PM

It is possible
For a poet
Without seeming to notice -
Secured
In a rusted world
At the window glass -
To ask why
In a way he could not understand.

--- these are beautiful lines. truly they are. i feel these lines touch me like they know who i am.
the lines are so encompassing, exuding certainty and finality.
i personally believe that one of the worst things that ruins a good piece of writing is that "half-baked tone" that some pieces have fluttering about them.
to leave your readers hanging with curiosity or a feeling of wonder is one thing.....to leave them feeling a certain LACK is an entirely different matter.
nice job. smiling smiley


Re: My Own Abstraction
Posted by: petersz (67.174.198.---)
Date: October 11, 2021 04:10PM

Les,

yes, abstraction is basic to our way in the world.

Rosela,

I do believe ambiguity is better than equivocation. I was unaware of 'exuding certainty and finality' in this piece. The language demands the attitude of me, rather than the other way around. I do understand your impatience with a 'half-baked tone.

I appreciate both of these responses, Les and Rosela.

amo,

Peter




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