User Submitted Poetry
 Interested in feedback about a piece you've written? 

eMule -> The Poetry Archive -> Forums -> User Submitted Poetry


Goto Thread: PreviousNext
Goto: Forum ListMessage ListNew TopicSearchLog In
Jacks or Better
Posted by: JJack (76.219.130.---)
Date: January 25, 2022 12:52PM

The change in tenses in the middle doesn't read well, but sounds okay aloud.



Someone somewhere has a lot to answer for
Jesus never showed up for his three o'clock
Satan is holding on line two
And I'm left holding the bag

Maybe just one more hand
Jesus anteed up, then folded
Satan will play what he's dealt
I'll take one. No help

To think it is to do it
To own it, to be it
He said it. I read it
Heaven won't have me now


Re: Jacks or Better
Posted by: les712 (68.116.91.---)
Date: January 26, 2022 05:13AM

Jack, I find the last stanza interesting. I'm not sure the metaphor works here, but I like the concept anyway.

Les


Re: Jacks or Better
Posted by: UPMarty (71.86.178.---)
Date: January 26, 2022 11:29PM

Jack,

Glad to see a post from you. I can't say I understand what's being said with the poem, but it sounds like a predicament. I've never played a game of poker, but have been in a few predicaments, including Satan holding on line two...and Jesus just showing up whenever he feels like it. That's one good thing about taking "walk-ins" and not putting any music on your hold line smiling smiley.

Mary




Sorry, only registered users may post in this forum.
This poetry forum at emule.com powered by Phorum.