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The Poem
Posted by: larkinabout (86.171.157.---)
Date: May 16, 2022 11:25PM

It opened as a carnival: hoots and howls
and you allowing for violence.
It knew you somehow; lowered your scowl
hunched your back, adjusted your glasses.
Worked on you like a playground wound,
tears held back, progressed liked cress
with an abundant ease, similarly cultivated.
It didn’t have much to say for itself, and
finished as it started, hoots and howls,
bloodandbrokenglass.


Re: The Poem
Posted by: petersz (69.181.22.---)
Date: May 17, 2022 01:05AM

Like the way it ends.

Cheers,

Peter


Re: The Poem
Posted by: UPMarty (71.87.67.---)
Date: May 17, 2022 01:35AM

Kris, a different take on the subject. It's sort of heartwarming that you'd even go there (wink). I like it.

In my humble, if even not so humble, opinion, it would be stronger to remove "you" from line 2. The poem itself, having its own persona...then drawing "you" into it.

It opened as a carnival: hoots and howls
and allowing for violence.
It knew you somehow; lowered your scowl


Mary


Re: The Poem
Posted by: larkinabout (86.167.229.---)
Date: May 17, 2022 11:19PM

cheers me dears.

"In my humble, if even not so humble, opinion, it would be stronger to remove "you" from line 2. The poem itself, having its own persona...then drawing "you" into it."

Yes, i think you're right Mary, I'll ponder.


Re: The Poem
Posted by: hpesoj (69.116.241.---)
Date: May 18, 2022 07:19AM

Kris:

You don't come around so often these days, but when you do it's worth the read.

Joe


Re: The Poem
Posted by: Mr. P (24.20.36.---)
Date: May 18, 2022 02:27PM

Here we see a sight never caught on camera. The elusive, yet vocal, arrogant-son-of-a-bitch, considering another's point of view. Oye! He spotted us! Back, Back! Drop it! Run!


Re: The Poem
Posted by: larkinabout (86.145.161.---)
Date: May 19, 2022 09:41PM

Cheers Joe, always good to see your name.

Like your use of hyphens there Percy old boy, nice...


Re: The Poem
Posted by: petersz (69.181.22.---)
Date: May 28, 2022 04:42PM

Garden cress (Lepidium sativum). [Credits : Till Westermayer]any of several plants of the mustard family (Brassicaceae), of interest for their piquant young basal leaves, which may be used in salads or as seasonings and garnishes. Watercress (Nasturtium officinale), perhaps the most popular of the edible cresses, is a hardy creeping perennial plant, native to Europe but extensively naturalized elsewhere in streams, pools, and ditches. Fresh watercress is used as a salad green and sandwich filling. Common garden cress, or peppergrass (Lepidium sativum), a fast-growing, often weedy native of western Asia, is widely grown, especially in its curl-leaved form, and the seedlings are used as a garnish.

I liked the phrasing of:

Worked on you like a playground wound,
tears held back,

Avanti,

Peter


Re: The Poem
Posted by: JohnnyBoy (71.249.169.---)
Date: May 28, 2022 05:02PM

swirling !


Re: The Poem
Posted by: Steevo (66.82.9.---)
Date: May 30, 2022 12:17PM

Great commentary. Reminds a little of an old favorite by Louis Simpson.
(See Frivolous)
Thanks for the good read.
Steve


Re: The Poem
Posted by: larkinabout (81.157.189.---)
Date: May 31, 2022 09:02PM

Thanks peeps.

Gotta love Cress, it grows any freaking where.

In the end there will be the cockroach and cress...

K x




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