I can’t remember what it was like
Before – probably it was different,
But maybe it was the same
I don’t know how heavy
Or young
It was then
I don’t remember what filled
The cracks in a day
I can feel the sun
Its rays on my face
That much is real
I know because it is warm
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/09/2021 10:00PM by aaron.
Interesting! The vagueness gives your poem the power of possibility. I like that feature. To me it sounds like a "heavy" yet "young" heart before that cannot remember or does not want to remember but a moment of warmth like the present!
This is what your poem makes me think now. Tomorrow it will become before and perhaps that will differ after? !
Thanks
K.Q.
As we get older it becomes crucial to remember that we do not remember what it was like before...each of the life changing events in our lives, no matter how large or small...thanks for the reminder, aaron,
Peter
Go! Celebrate the sunshine
Fill your pouch with daffodils
Until your journey ends.
Joe
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/07/2021 10:33AM by hpesoj.
A second poem with a very Asian feel to its esoterica.
I love it and love it even more when the poet understands
nuance of this tradition requires great skill to master
and sometimes more skill to read. But you have allowed both
your skill as poet and your kindness as poet to triumph. great write. tom
Thank you all for reading and commenting. I was actually quite embarrassed that I posted it, as it is more of a stream of conscious than a poem. I think I need to change some things around.
K.Q. – At first it was not vague at all, but when I took out the word “cancer” I think it took on a new and better quality.
You are welcome Peter, and thank you.
Joe - As soon as the sun starts shining, Ill be right there.
Tom – I wish I could say I understood the nuance of the tradition, but I guess I just got lucky. Thanks for the kind words and welcome to the board. I think you write very interesting pieces. I wish you would wait longer before posting more poems to give us the chance to read them more carefully.
Cheers
Aaron
I like this poem. I smiled after I read it. Something so obvious as "I know because it is warm" is somehow perfectly insightful and wonderful to read.